Another Reason Why I Don’t Keep a Gun in the House

The neighbors’ dog will not stop barking.
He is barking the same high, rhythmic bark
that he barks every time they leave the house.
They must switch him on on their way out.

The neighbor’s dog will not stop barking.
I close all the windows in the house
and put on a Beethoven symphony full blast
but I can still hear him muffled under the music,
barking, barking, barking,

and now I can see him sitting in the orchestra,
his head raised confidently as if Beethoven
had included a part for barking dog.

When the record finally ends he is still barking,
sitting there in the oboe section barking,
his eyes fixed on the conductor who is
entreating him with his baton

while the other musicians listen in respectful
silence to the famous barking dog solo,
that endless coda that first established
Beethoven as an innovative genius.

By Billy Collins
taken from The Apple That Astonished Paris

Afterthought

There it goes again!

Just like that stupid dog in the poem, barks, barks, barks! Why does it have to bark so early on a Sunday morning? Unlike my wife I am a light sleeper. Most likely due to the training I had while I was doing my National Service. Imagine having to storm out of the barrack in the middle of the night and be combat ready in less than a minute. Looking back, it was kind of cool actually. But what the heck, I am now a civilian, can’t I seep in peace?

Wouldn’t it be nice if dogs could talk instead of these senseless barking? “Where is my breakfast? Are you trying to starve me?" or “Time for my morning walk so get your fat ass moving human slave!"

There it goes again! I can't even write in peace. If only I could just pinpoint its exact location, oh boy I will not hesitate to give a piece of my mind to its owner. It is driving me crazy! Arghhhh!!!!!